In UK, I have met this unique genre of human species. They are semi Asians (i.e. their parents/grand parents immigrated from India/Pakistan, generally the Punjab area); they have their hair gelled and maintain a portion of it like a spike just above the fore-head in the front; they wear black rectangular rimmed glasses (just like those Sania Mirza used to wear); they carry their cell phone in a hands free mode; they keep talking in their cell phones in a language called Hinpunjish (which could be said to be a hybrid of Hindi, Punjabi and English); they listen to the music albums like ‘Shakalakalakalakalaka… boom boom’. If you are from London, I am sure you can identify this category of people. They are the estate agents!!
Having got to change my house thrice in a year and a half, I invariably had to meet them whether I liked it or not. “Oh sorry Mrs. Pai, that house is just gone. But we have this lovely flat close to station…” This is the common statement every agent makes when you enquire about a house you had seen in their ad in the net. “It just went now … just before 5 minutes” follow later. I wonder why every house I find interesting goes just a few minutes before I enquire. Initially I thought this was real and got worried. But having got to hear the same statement in the same pattern from different people made me realize me that this was a common statement made by any estate agent. If there was training academy for estate agents then this statement would be the first lessen taught just like the first lesson ‘A for Apple, B for Ball…’ taught in schools.
Apart from the alike appearances I mentioned above, estate agents have many more attributes in common-
1. They have an attitude that they are the busiest people in the world. They keep answering calls every couple of minutes, they talk in heated tones, and they hardly have any time to show you a place at a time mentioned by you. They always suggest a different timing which is inconvenient to you and yet you agree to it.
2. In spite of pretending to be busy always, they do not realize that time is valuable for other party i.e. you as well. They keep you waiting for hours together.
3. Most of their clients are IT professionals who have just landed up in UK and are earnestly looking for a place to live. They misuse this desperateness of their clients and try to exploit them as mush as possible
4. They do not provide any chance for the tenant to meet the landlord. “Mrs Pai, I know the landlord, he wouldn’t agree to this…””Let me speak to him. I think I can convince him” “No, sorry Mrs Pai but we cannot give you the contact number of the landlord” “Why?” “That’s how we deal Mrs Pai. The landlords do not want their numbers given”…The conversation goes this way. They trap you fully only after which you are allowed to meet the landlord who turns out to be a nice and sensitive man. But then you are already trapped.
5. They use a unique kind of blackmail to get you trapped. “Oh Mrs Pai, you have a situation here. I don’t think you will get a better house than this.” “Ok, I’ll tell you tomorrow” “Mrs Pai, houses go like hot cakes… I doubt if this will remain when you say tomorrow” “I need some time. I will tell you tonight” “No Mrs Pai, you would have to tell us now, you see they go and you wouldn’t be able to find a place…”blah blah.
6. They shamelessly ask your income, your husband’s income and you say it although you know it is not required for anyone to know how much you earn.
To say it one word they are liars. If you think you can become estate agent being sincere and nice then you are undoubtedly wrong. Lying is the basic criteria in this field. We had to find a house for a short term and were in search of one. We went to the agent who had got us the current one and told our requirement. “Oh! That is difficult! You have a situation here” (Please note the word situation is generally used in UK when you are amidst some trouble having some problems) He thinks….”Mmmm… Mrs Pai I have one house worth £675 at xxx” “But xxx is very far from the town centre.” “Yes it is not very close, but you see you have a situation here Mrs Pai” “Yes I know I need a house for short term, but I do not need immediately. I still have time, so you can find me something which is closer” “But Mrs Pai, you should understand that you have a situation and it is difficult to find one with such situation “ I go and see the house which is not only far but also damp and dirty and refuse to take it. “Mrs Pai, it is not advisable to leave it being in your situation” “Gimme time. I need to think. “I get the same reply I anticipated “I have to show it to somebody in the evening. It might go by then. “This time I don’t budge in for these threats. After lots of bargaining and talks about our ‘situation’, “Mrs Pai we can give it to you for £600” “No I still think it is not fit to live” “I can give it to you for £580 Mrs Pai, being in the situation you are taking this is the best deal”
We did not want to get in a ‘situation’ which never existed by taking that house. We did get a house after lots and lots of searches followed by such situations with the estate agents. But I got very frustrated by the way these people try to exploit your weakness. I just wanted to go back and tell them on their faces to be human and sensitive. But my husband stopped me and told that we didn’t want to get into a situation.
Having got to change my house thrice in a year and a half, I invariably had to meet them whether I liked it or not. “Oh sorry Mrs. Pai, that house is just gone. But we have this lovely flat close to station…” This is the common statement every agent makes when you enquire about a house you had seen in their ad in the net. “It just went now … just before 5 minutes” follow later. I wonder why every house I find interesting goes just a few minutes before I enquire. Initially I thought this was real and got worried. But having got to hear the same statement in the same pattern from different people made me realize me that this was a common statement made by any estate agent. If there was training academy for estate agents then this statement would be the first lessen taught just like the first lesson ‘A for Apple, B for Ball…’ taught in schools.
Apart from the alike appearances I mentioned above, estate agents have many more attributes in common-
1. They have an attitude that they are the busiest people in the world. They keep answering calls every couple of minutes, they talk in heated tones, and they hardly have any time to show you a place at a time mentioned by you. They always suggest a different timing which is inconvenient to you and yet you agree to it.
2. In spite of pretending to be busy always, they do not realize that time is valuable for other party i.e. you as well. They keep you waiting for hours together.
3. Most of their clients are IT professionals who have just landed up in UK and are earnestly looking for a place to live. They misuse this desperateness of their clients and try to exploit them as mush as possible
4. They do not provide any chance for the tenant to meet the landlord. “Mrs Pai, I know the landlord, he wouldn’t agree to this…””Let me speak to him. I think I can convince him” “No, sorry Mrs Pai but we cannot give you the contact number of the landlord” “Why?” “That’s how we deal Mrs Pai. The landlords do not want their numbers given”…The conversation goes this way. They trap you fully only after which you are allowed to meet the landlord who turns out to be a nice and sensitive man. But then you are already trapped.
5. They use a unique kind of blackmail to get you trapped. “Oh Mrs Pai, you have a situation here. I don’t think you will get a better house than this.” “Ok, I’ll tell you tomorrow” “Mrs Pai, houses go like hot cakes… I doubt if this will remain when you say tomorrow” “I need some time. I will tell you tonight” “No Mrs Pai, you would have to tell us now, you see they go and you wouldn’t be able to find a place…”blah blah.
6. They shamelessly ask your income, your husband’s income and you say it although you know it is not required for anyone to know how much you earn.
To say it one word they are liars. If you think you can become estate agent being sincere and nice then you are undoubtedly wrong. Lying is the basic criteria in this field. We had to find a house for a short term and were in search of one. We went to the agent who had got us the current one and told our requirement. “Oh! That is difficult! You have a situation here” (Please note the word situation is generally used in UK when you are amidst some trouble having some problems) He thinks….”Mmmm… Mrs Pai I have one house worth £675 at xxx” “But xxx is very far from the town centre.” “Yes it is not very close, but you see you have a situation here Mrs Pai” “Yes I know I need a house for short term, but I do not need immediately. I still have time, so you can find me something which is closer” “But Mrs Pai, you should understand that you have a situation and it is difficult to find one with such situation “ I go and see the house which is not only far but also damp and dirty and refuse to take it. “Mrs Pai, it is not advisable to leave it being in your situation” “Gimme time. I need to think. “I get the same reply I anticipated “I have to show it to somebody in the evening. It might go by then. “This time I don’t budge in for these threats. After lots of bargaining and talks about our ‘situation’, “Mrs Pai we can give it to you for £600” “No I still think it is not fit to live” “I can give it to you for £580 Mrs Pai, being in the situation you are taking this is the best deal”
We did not want to get in a ‘situation’ which never existed by taking that house. We did get a house after lots and lots of searches followed by such situations with the estate agents. But I got very frustrated by the way these people try to exploit your weakness. I just wanted to go back and tell them on their faces to be human and sensitive. But my husband stopped me and told that we didn’t want to get into a situation.
1 comment:
Hey CP, nice one! I can consult you for any help I need if at all I get in to a "situation" in UK :-)
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